noonie

the-angels-have-teslas-at-221b:

msfw:

im like 80% sure all texans ride horses to school and carry around pistols and cowboy hats

i am a texan and i can confirm this

(via paging-doctorfaggot)

• grandma: so do you have a boyfriend yet?
• me: not in this economy
• more like girlfriend ;)

gymleaderfrank:

If you think you’re funny just because you make fun of people then you’re actually not funny.

(via edating)

edwad:

jaseherondale:

Did you know in that Australia it’s five times more likely a you’ll pick a partner based on humour rather then looks so if you’re ugly but a hilarious motherfucker then you’re almost guaranteed love

yea but have u ever seen an ugly australian

(via lol-rofl-lmfao)

flyingpig890:

dorothy-cotton:

im not a murderer some of my best friends are alive

some

(via thatsqualitystuff)

spirit-of-the-ocean:

my uncle used to be one of those people who drove dead people to cemeteries and such 

then he became a taxi driver and the person he was driving tapped his shoulder to ask a question and my uncle screamed really loud

(via thatsqualitystuff)

conveys:

i just realized that the voice in my head when i read things isn’t my own voice omg whose is it

(Source: praises, via emilaugh)